Time to ignore sensible advise,
Put a cotton in both ears,
Lay a blanket and sleep on thought,
Stall the moment that been plundering my mind,
Its time to hear nothing in my ears,
But my own voice.

I don’t belong in question

Every nature of me opposed it

Life is too short and too beautiful to be lost with question

And yet I speak of it

Like the morning rain that drives the breeze away

The most alive moment

Comes upon the smile from inside

When seeing you lights up the gratitude i have for my life here

Every once in a late while

I met people that give shimmering excitement

Of music, laughter and poetry in my life

So you are not trouble

You are one that added smile in my day

Jive and Step

The bruits are dancing now more than ever. Doing Jive and Steps in my jaw. I hope they are just dancing.

A friend died today,
For the first time matters of life and death effected me beyond any desirable measure.

I lost a lot of people that was close to me,
Among most was my dear auntie,
And yet, i never even shed a tears.

The fact is, the girl that died today,
I don't even know her,
A friend of a friend. Who lives 10,000 km away.

And yet, for the first time in my life,
I cried all my tears for the girl i never knew.

Because i was in her place.

Like her, I was told it was just going to be a 3 hour operation,
But ended up fighting for our lives instead,

Like her i was too young to go,
But yet we ended up in the ICU on the life support machine,

Like her i got family and friends waiting in the hallway,
Praying for us to survive, praying for a miracle,
Only today i was in the shoes with the people who prayed,
Not the one whose given 1% chance to live.

The realization for the great amount of worry and pain that ive cause
to those that love me. For those who waited patiently
counting every second with hope that i will wake up.

But unlike her,
I got my miracle,
and she didn't......

And i realized how fortunate i am.

But amidst that i couldnt grasp the fact that she died, for I keep on praying that
she will have her miracle as i did, for the selfish thought that yes everyone deserves a miracle. And i believed that she is strong, as im not meant to survived but i did, and she should too.

Some will say that is life, others will say everything happen for a reason,

When i was in the coma, my dad left a book for anyone to write their wishes for me,
yesterday i read it again and i found this at the back of the page..i must have written
it shortly after....

If i have been gone....

You can cry all the tears now that i am gone,
or you can smile because i have lived,

You can loose hope and close your eyes,
or you can open them and see the strength i had in me,

You can block thoughts of me completely,
or you can cherish my memory and let it live,

You can feel sad knowing you can't feel me,
or you can be be joyful knowing that i have love fully,

You can feel pity that i was too young to go,
or you can feel happy knowing that ive lived a small girl with a big heart all my life,

You can ignore the world and be discouraged,
or you can do what you know i will do;

Love fully, go on with life, and go on with a smile.


and in my heart, i would like to think that she would say the same too....

How lovely it is to be with someone who i can love like crazy and loves me the same way back.

To fall in love, to be deliriously happy each and everyday.

But of course, it is simply too flattering sweet to be substantial. Im blissfully happy that its almost unreal. A few stolen moment is what i have.

You who makes me smile and laugh silly. Levitate me and let me dance freely in passionate rhythm.

Truth is, there is no sense to life without it, to make the journey and not fall in love, you haven't lived a life at all. 1

1. Meet Joe Black memorable quote

First Day at NACO

Allright! First day at NACO office at Den Haag. So far so good, still can't believe im here working at the NACO office. Million of thanx to my Project Manager for the opportunity;

Also a bit scared if Im not able to carry on the task- Im here to assist the senior architect for the new terminal at KLIA. Big task. The airport is as big as the existing one and I have never done any large scale project such as this before. But! Will try my very best;

Struggling with Jet leg, trying to stay awake by 5pm Holland time. Yup, it's almost 12am Msia time so pretty much on coffee and double espresso now;

For Breakfast Bread, Lunch Bread with Fish and Chip, and an oven cooked meal brought from the super mart for Dinner. Halal food are available everywhere no prob. Otherwise Il just take fish. Am not fasting today, maybe next week hopefully;

The fasting time here is from 5am till 9pm. So it will be quite a challenge.

Im getting along well with everybody in the office, very friendly and very helpful! It's nice and very lively environment here. Im stationed at the 3rd Floor, the Architectur and 3D Animie Floor;

At where I am seated theres an English Guy, A Chinese Lady, A Dutch and of coz, a small Malay Lady. So everyone converse in English so I feel very much welcome;

My colleague have been very wonderful, I am staying at her house till Monday then after that off to a Hotel. Must say Im suitably impress with her house, very sheek with a designer touch. Makes me wanna have my own house and decorate it exactly like hers. Il post pictures of the house later, it is really nice. She's been driving me around and making sure everything is ok, been wonderfully wonderful! Dont ask if that's even a noun;

So far so very good. Weather is unpredictable, sometime rainy sometime sunny. Its about 19 degree outside and Im loving the cool breezy wind!